Profiles In Courage - Swim Class
Round these parts summertime is for doing kid things like going to every playground we see and the ultimate test of mama's sanity- swim class. Now, generally, extracurricular classes are dad's domain. He takes little Lady K to class and he stays with her. It serves as daddy/daughter time and mama also gets to stay home and finish a HOT cup of coffee and get herself together. It is wonderful. It worked through the Spring (dance class) and we had set the Summer up to follow suit. But summer is swim class... and swim class is not for the faint of heart.
Two weeks ago, hubs visited a Goldfish swim school in a central Ohio suburb and signed up Little Lady K for class. He attended the first class with her and it was traumatizing for the toddler. Last week, after class, she asked me to come to class with her and dada.I checked on my portable coffee mug supply and once I saw that I had five mugs to choose from, I told her that I would come and watch her class.
Y'all, why did I take my ass to that class? I am generally not in the best of moods because I am often on the "all these people can fuck right off" train. Even as a mom. Most people are just annoying and I am NOT excited for having my kid in a class with their kids... not because of the KIDS, but because some people are just shit parents. But there I was, early as hell (for me) on a Tuesday morning, in a northern suburb, watching my kid be traumatized by some teeny bopper swim "instructor".
Yeah, needless to say, that shit didn't go well. As I shared before Little Lady K went through a stage where she would scream bloody murder at bath time. Didn't matter if it was in the baby bath, the big tub, a shower, rain falling on her head. There would be screaming. For seven months. It was a long seven months for mama. Then dada put his feet in the tub during bath time and now we have no problems. Amazing, right? So when hubs signed her up for class, one of the things he was firm on was Lady K has to be EASED into swimming. She loves the bath...NOW. But that was a result of blood, sweat and crocodile tears. I wasn't at the first class so I can't tell you how that went. But yesterday's class? That was a shit show. The "instructor" literally had my baby's face under water, twice. K was screaming to high heaven and the teacher just seemed annoyed. Bitch... follow instructions. I am amazed at my willpower not to drown that chick in the shallow end.
Needless to say that K did NOT want to finish her swim class and did not want to go back. We were offered a replacement class because I am telling you, it was a dumpster fire. We were the parents that got a visit from the school manager. Our replacement lesson was today- and we chose to have a mommy and me type class instead of one led by an instructor. There were no tears. There was participation and one (tentative) smile. You know why? Because I know how to ease my kid into shit-- I ASK HER. She is three and she can talk. She told me "mama, I scared. I no want my head in the water today." So, we didn't put her head in the water.
Now listen, I swear I am not one of those moms who is all over people about the special needs of my kid. She really doesn't have many. She is down for a lot of stuff that I don't really want her to do. She is adventurous and is guaranteed to be the life of almost every party she goes to. My chick-a-dee is all over the place, loving life and such. So, if I (or hubs) tell you that my kid has a serious issue with rushing into water stuff and you will soon be leading her in water stuff, maybe... just maybe you should listen? No? Oh. OK.
We won't be using that instructor anymore... and I am going to let hubs decide if he wants to continue the Daddy and me class format. The manager was nice enough, so yay I didn't have to ruin his day (count that personal growth on my part). Y'all know I was LOOKING for the instructor from yesterday, right? I just want to talk. I swear.
Two weeks ago, hubs visited a Goldfish swim school in a central Ohio suburb and signed up Little Lady K for class. He attended the first class with her and it was traumatizing for the toddler. Last week, after class, she asked me to come to class with her and dada.I checked on my portable coffee mug supply and once I saw that I had five mugs to choose from, I told her that I would come and watch her class.
Y'all, why did I take my ass to that class? I am generally not in the best of moods because I am often on the "all these people can fuck right off" train. Even as a mom. Most people are just annoying and I am NOT excited for having my kid in a class with their kids... not because of the KIDS, but because some people are just shit parents. But there I was, early as hell (for me) on a Tuesday morning, in a northern suburb, watching my kid be traumatized by some teeny bopper swim "instructor".
Yeah, needless to say, that shit didn't go well. As I shared before Little Lady K went through a stage where she would scream bloody murder at bath time. Didn't matter if it was in the baby bath, the big tub, a shower, rain falling on her head. There would be screaming. For seven months. It was a long seven months for mama. Then dada put his feet in the tub during bath time and now we have no problems. Amazing, right? So when hubs signed her up for class, one of the things he was firm on was Lady K has to be EASED into swimming. She loves the bath...NOW. But that was a result of blood, sweat and crocodile tears. I wasn't at the first class so I can't tell you how that went. But yesterday's class? That was a shit show. The "instructor" literally had my baby's face under water, twice. K was screaming to high heaven and the teacher just seemed annoyed. Bitch... follow instructions. I am amazed at my willpower not to drown that chick in the shallow end.
Needless to say that K did NOT want to finish her swim class and did not want to go back. We were offered a replacement class because I am telling you, it was a dumpster fire. We were the parents that got a visit from the school manager. Our replacement lesson was today- and we chose to have a mommy and me type class instead of one led by an instructor. There were no tears. There was participation and one (tentative) smile. You know why? Because I know how to ease my kid into shit-- I ASK HER. She is three and she can talk. She told me "mama, I scared. I no want my head in the water today." So, we didn't put her head in the water.
Now listen, I swear I am not one of those moms who is all over people about the special needs of my kid. She really doesn't have many. She is down for a lot of stuff that I don't really want her to do. She is adventurous and is guaranteed to be the life of almost every party she goes to. My chick-a-dee is all over the place, loving life and such. So, if I (or hubs) tell you that my kid has a serious issue with rushing into water stuff and you will soon be leading her in water stuff, maybe... just maybe you should listen? No? Oh. OK.
We won't be using that instructor anymore... and I am going to let hubs decide if he wants to continue the Daddy and me class format. The manager was nice enough, so yay I didn't have to ruin his day (count that personal growth on my part). Y'all know I was LOOKING for the instructor from yesterday, right? I just want to talk. I swear.
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