PheMOMena

Welcome back to my crazy life! I know, I know, you probably just made a face and thought "I mean, how crazy could her life ACTUALLY be?" Well, darling, let me fill you in... on just the last day and a half. [Maybe my life isn't crazy. Maybe I am crazy. Could be. Yeah... totally could be.] It is just shy of three in the morning and here I am, trying to type quietly so I don't wake the irritable toddler that (finally) decided to go to sleep "in mama's bed." The same bed that she has peed in TWICE in the last 36 hours. BTW- never been so happy to have purchased a mattress protector, IN MY WHOLE LIFE. Big girl panties SUCK. So, laundry is the pits and I find myself just wanting to throw everything away, turn our Honda Element into a mini camper and go to the land of 'no sheets allowed' where toddlers walk around naked until they can figure out that they don't like the sensation of warm piss flowing down their formerly chunky legs. Yesterday

You know, when you are pregnant people think  it is hilarious to send you pictures and videos of massive diaper blowouts. Babies just covered in poop, onesies that will never recover-- no matter how many times they are washed. You also get lovely pictures of toddlers covered in peanut butter or shaving cream, while writing on white walls with a black permanent marker. When I was pregnant I was convinced that my friends and family were trying to torture me with proof of misdeeds by little people.  I think that maybe those pictures and videos helped strengthen my nerves when it came to poop. Luckily, hubs and I never really had to deal with lots of poop or puke. I can count on one hand how many times in her 23 months that Baby K puked all over. Each time it was because she was inhaling her favorite food-- green beans. The explosive puke was traumatic, at the time, but so infrequent that I wasn't even going to write about it.  What I do NOT understand is why no one ever told

Let's end February with a bang! The first two months of 2018 have been significantly... extra. Baby K has been sick twice-- the January edition of "sick baby" landed us in the doctor's office (story later because mama is still traumatized). I have gone to three memorial services. We have been traveling on the weekend (basketball season) and I am not sure that I actually finished unpacking from our end of the year (2017) trip to Savannah. Y'all, I'm living off of caffeine and bad decision making. Slow down, 2018... no need to drop kick me this early in the year.  In addition to the whirlwind of emotions that come with the above named craziness, I'll tell you what else I have been feeling: judgment. Now listen, BEFORE Baby K I was not really sensitive to the judgment hoisted at me from other people. I didn't really notice it and, frankly, I just didn't care. I still don't care, but I notice the judgment more. I mean, God forbid Baby K fall i