Mother of Multiples?
Summertime in the city. We have been hitting the streets a lot lately, traveling and such. When folks see the cute, chubby Baby K one of the first things they ask is: "Are you going to have another baby?"
Uh, no-- thank you for asking. Such a weird question to ask... especially if we aren't related. Or close. Or acquaintances. This one little, old lady told me that if I didn't have another baby, Baby K would be lonely and grow up to resent me. Also, according to her, I didn't need to get the all clear from the doc before hubs and I started "trying" again... we should "just do it." Dear ma'am at the grocery store... Uh, NO.
Ok, a couple things. First: I can honestly say, I have never had an overwhelming want or need to be a mom. I mean, it is great work if you can get it, but it certainly was not on my radar for the first 35 years of my life. Now, I love the time that I spend with my little chubbers, but it totally was not at the top of my vision board to have a baby. Until it was.
Second: I know I always say that hubs and I are old. Because we are. And I have to say: pregnancy was no walk in the park. In fact, I did not enjoy pregnancy. I was exhausted every day. I was swollen; the heartburn was like a fiery pit in my esophagus every day and my skin was as dry as the Sahara. Plus, there are a lot of tests that need to be taken care of when you are above the age of 35 and embarking on the adventure known as parenthood. My journey certainly was not like anything I have seen on those Lifetime movies. Y'all, I didn't have no glow. At all. I was a wreck for approximately 36 out of the 39 weeks and I don't REALLY want to go through that shit again.
Third: We would like to retire at some point. We live in the midwest, our cost of living is manageable but, and I am not sure you guys have noticed, kids are EXPENSIVE. I am a stay at home mom, so clearly we can make it on one salary, but I am sure that hubs doesn't want to work until he is 80!
Fourth (and I cannot stress this enough): whether hubs and I have another baby is truly, like REALLY, no one else's business. Look, as soon as people could tell that I was pregnant, the suggestions started to flow. How I should eat and sleep; what kind of birth I should have; whether I should go back to working outside the home; reasons why I should breastfeed... reasons why I shouldn't; how I should dress my child; cloth diapers vs. disposables; what I should have time for; what my house should look like; what I should give up for the sake of a pristine motherhood experience. The list is never-ending. All listed are pretty big decisions... that hubs and I should make. When we were first considering parenthood, I think both of us were really comfortable with the idea of having an only child. We are even more comfortable with that idea now. Three months in. Don't foresee any minds changing 'round here!
So, while we appreciate the congratulations and the compliments ("You guys made the cutest kid" is totally my favorite compliment, EVER) uh, we have no plans to add to our brood. One daughter, three dogs and one cat is our limit. We are all good over here!
Uh, no-- thank you for asking. Such a weird question to ask... especially if we aren't related. Or close. Or acquaintances. This one little, old lady told me that if I didn't have another baby, Baby K would be lonely and grow up to resent me. Also, according to her, I didn't need to get the all clear from the doc before hubs and I started "trying" again... we should "just do it." Dear ma'am at the grocery store... Uh, NO.
Ok, a couple things. First: I can honestly say, I have never had an overwhelming want or need to be a mom. I mean, it is great work if you can get it, but it certainly was not on my radar for the first 35 years of my life. Now, I love the time that I spend with my little chubbers, but it totally was not at the top of my vision board to have a baby. Until it was.
Second: I know I always say that hubs and I are old. Because we are. And I have to say: pregnancy was no walk in the park. In fact, I did not enjoy pregnancy. I was exhausted every day. I was swollen; the heartburn was like a fiery pit in my esophagus every day and my skin was as dry as the Sahara. Plus, there are a lot of tests that need to be taken care of when you are above the age of 35 and embarking on the adventure known as parenthood. My journey certainly was not like anything I have seen on those Lifetime movies. Y'all, I didn't have no glow. At all. I was a wreck for approximately 36 out of the 39 weeks and I don't REALLY want to go through that shit again.
Third: We would like to retire at some point. We live in the midwest, our cost of living is manageable but, and I am not sure you guys have noticed, kids are EXPENSIVE. I am a stay at home mom, so clearly we can make it on one salary, but I am sure that hubs doesn't want to work until he is 80!
Fourth (and I cannot stress this enough): whether hubs and I have another baby is truly, like REALLY, no one else's business. Look, as soon as people could tell that I was pregnant, the suggestions started to flow. How I should eat and sleep; what kind of birth I should have; whether I should go back to working outside the home; reasons why I should breastfeed... reasons why I shouldn't; how I should dress my child; cloth diapers vs. disposables; what I should have time for; what my house should look like; what I should give up for the sake of a pristine motherhood experience. The list is never-ending. All listed are pretty big decisions... that hubs and I should make. When we were first considering parenthood, I think both of us were really comfortable with the idea of having an only child. We are even more comfortable with that idea now. Three months in. Don't foresee any minds changing 'round here!
So, while we appreciate the congratulations and the compliments ("You guys made the cutest kid" is totally my favorite compliment, EVER) uh, we have no plans to add to our brood. One daughter, three dogs and one cat is our limit. We are all good over here!
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