E is for Examinations #AtoZChallenge

Ah, the joys of pregnancy. Amirite, ladies? What you will discover VERY early on is that pregnancy is about growing a healthy baby AND getting examined. Exams, exams, exams... and a few blood tests. Trust me, readers, I am certainly no prude, however, there is nothing that prepares you for the number of times your doctor (and whoever is assisting him) will see your nether regions during this 10 month time period. I mean, it is like a party where you don't wear pants. Pantless party - population you and one sturdy pair of stirrups. Mercy! 

It starts rather early too. It isn't like they give you a chance to get comfortable with the idea of going from a pap smear once every two years to throwing your feet above your head every other office visit. They don't really ease a girl into this. As I recall, you are safe for the first visit because they don't REALLY know if you are carrying an energy zapping parasite, er, baby. You go in and say "hey, I think I might be expecting a little human in about 9 months" or something along those lines and they hit you with a pregnancy test. My original doctor made me take two  tests-- 1 was a urine test, 1 was a blood test. Both were positive.  They took a lot of blood (more on that in a different post) and then scheduled me for another appointment in 3 weeks (age, weight and family history made me a high risk pregnant lady, so I saw the doctor a lot.)

That second appointment? BOOM: Trans vaginal ultrasound to make sure everything was going well (and that there was only ONE baby in my uterus). A blurry little picture of a little alien like being was taken to burn the moment into our minds. I didn't need the picture-- I am still traumatized by the thought of the ultrasound wand. I switched doctors at the beginning of my pregnancy, so I didn't have to get another trans vaginal ultrasound (thankfully), but I did have to get an exam at my first appointment with the new doctor. Like I said, nothing prepares you. 


The closer you get to having your baby, your appointments become more frequent and you are examined to see if labor has started/how far along you might be. Essentially you get about 12 years worth of exams during a pregnancy. I mean, I know it is necessary, but honestly they are uncomfortable and irritating-- picture the joy on my face, heavily pregnant, feet in stirrups, totally ready for my baby to just be out of me, bracing for yet ANOTHER exam. I did get to come up with a nifty exam mantra though---> It is all fun and games until the rubber gloves and KY comes out!!

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